2004-01-05 - 11:49 p.m.
dying on the inside doesn't begin to describe it. It's an empty pain I'm faced with day after day and night after night. My Juli. honestly, I don't think the story has to be told. I will anyway though, so it makes sense. This is to help me heal, to help me release a lot of the pain that builds up that I can't tell much of anyone.
*Chad and I met, and a week later I was determined he was different. We had sex, and I was hooked on him. I thought he was on me. He cheated on me, I forgave him...he said we'd make it work. We tried too. THen that cheating incident brought about a child. supposedly. His "ex" was pregnant and at 17, she would move in. I had 2 months until then. WE spent day in and out together, he would, often, get mad, and yell at me, curse me out, and once he hit me. But we continued, and at the beginning of September I discovered I was 3 weeks pregnant. b.c of the other girl's pregnancy, i decided to abort. This was the HARDEST decsison I ever had to make. He cheated on me again mid-september and we broke up, but put on a show so my parents wouldn't know.
